Jamie Foss crowned WB Superstar USA after finale duet with Mario Roger

Tuesday, June 15 2004

Contributed by: norcalfella

Given the popularity of the terrible auditions of American Idol year after year, the WB decided to clone AI and simply go after the worst singers. The result was pretty good I thought, although clearly the worst singer did not win the competition. The first thing they did was put together a a panel of judges and host that mirrored AI. Ryan Seacrest clone Brian McFayden hosted the show with a straight face. Vitamin C filled the Paula Abdul role, and Tone Loc occupied Randy Jackson\'s seat. Finally, Charles Briggs was the Simon Cowell \"character\" and absolutely made the show. This guy was more like a wicked mix of Cowell and Quentin Tarantino, and he always had something funny to say. From his \"Knock, knock. Who\'s there? You suck.\" to him telling a contestant that she made love to the song, his comments were so off the wall that I thought someone was going to catch on.

In the finale, Rosa was clearly the worst singer. Most of the time you couldn\'t even tell what she was saying and that was consistent in every episode. Nevertheless, she took third place.

Mario was almost as bad, and definitely delivered his worst showing of the competition, while Jamie wasn\'t even really bad, just not good. Obviously they wanted the blonde, big breasted Britney Spears lookalike to win the final prize. Who knows, maybe they\'ll make her into a star.

The worst part was that the payoff (telling the winner they suck) was muted. She didn\'t really understand what was happening and when it finally clicked in her dense head host Brian McFayden chimed in \"but this crowd loves you\". Boo.

The best part might have been that Mario and Rosa walked away with $10,000 and $5,000 for their part in the humiliation. Jamie gets $100,000 and a William Hung-esque recording contract.

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