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Monday, August 20 2018

Paradise Hotel with Amanda Byram has already gone where Temptation Island never has

EntertainmentWhat do you get when you mix chicks and dudes who are 21, 21, 22, 22, 24, 24, 26, 28, 30 and 31 respectively? A Fox reality show about getting some, that’s what. These people aren’t going to change the world with occupations like hair stylist, waitress, radio DJ, student, personal trainer (two!), graphic designer, importer, resort concierge, stock day trader and dental assistant. They’re here to entertain us by hooking up for our voyeuristic pleasure. I’ve got other thoughts and information if you push “read more”. Unlike Fox reality efforts of the past like Temptation Island or Love Cruise if the people don’t win the affection of a mate that week, they’re odd man or woman out and they exit stage left. Also, the action between the sheets is more than lip service. Two couples apparently went all the way out of five staying together the opening week.

On the downside, the lure of “you can join the show” is crap, because really that never happens, as the two people up for nomination have been pre-selected. It’s not like just any chump can dial a number and get on the show as they made it seem on the promos. They really don’t want the average Joe on the screen for obvious reasons.

Host Amanda Byram is sort of annoying and not really attractive or exciting to me in any way. The thing is, she comes cheap, and although according to that article she beat out Ulrika Jonsson, Tess Daly and Lisa Snowdon, I’ve never heard of any of them so big whoop. She’s better than Monica Lewinsky, or as norcaldoll likes to call her “that guy who (**** **** **) the President”.

Proving that reality is saturating the market, you might recognize Toni Ferrari from the aforementioned Love Cruise. I guess they figured they were in need of a veteran to guide the rest of the cast.

On the upside, at least people are hooking up instead of just talking about it. Toni has already given it up for Andon Guenther, while Zack Stewart answered Amy Toliver’s late night booty call. Zack is a 24 and earns spending money counting to 10 reps for people with no discipline to get themselves in shape. He did earn some respect points with me by honoring Amy’s request not to reveal what went on in their bedroom, but has otherwise been an ass in the house, behaving like someone in his middle teens.

The way the show works is that after a week of five couples and one outsider, who was Charla Seymour in the opening week, someone has to go. In the opening elimination, Charla got to get her claws into a man who couldn’t be stolen and chose Scott Thomas, who is 30 and responsible for stealing all our hard earned stock money. After three other already together couples united (Toni and Andon, Amy and Zack, Kristin Eliis and Alex Van Camp) that left Amanda and Melanie Barger fighting over Beau Ryan Wolf. What dude wouldn’t want two chicks digging him at the same time? Well, Beau seemed pained to choose his roommate Amanda, 22 and employed as a resort concierge, over Melanie, 31 and working as an importer of what we don’t know. Naturally at 22 himself he doesn’t want the older, more mature woman because it’s not a match. I’m done for now, more later.

Paradise Hotel with Amanda Byram has already gone where Temptation Island never has | 137 comments | Create New Account
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